Tears involuntarily fell as I was on my way home from school. I stopped for a moment to wipe it with my fingertips and wondered why the sudden waterworks. It’s the street, said a voice in a distant part of my mind. I looked around and I realised that it was my body reminding me of something that I buried deep in the crevices of my heart. The street was just the catalyst to exposed those emotions I’ve been suppressing.
A week ago, it was my first time to experience a sense of complete loss. It felt like there was a void in my heart and an intense pressure against the wall of bones. I couldn’t breathe.
“It’s over,” said the voice on the other line of the phone.
I slumped to the floor with my hand still holding the phone. It took me awhile to say something as my mind was trying to gather the remaining logic in me before being sleeping aids drowned by a flood of emotions.
“Why?” I whispered. My body started to numb and my chest was aching. I fought the tears welling up in my eyes. “I’ve been faithful…”
“I just need some space,” he said. “It’s just going to be a cool-off and we’ll see what happens.”
Liar! I shouted in the corners of my mind. I know he’s trying to comfort me, but I had the feeling that they were just empty words.
“Yes,” I finally said, wiping the tears from my eyes. “Can we meet?”
“Sure, next week so we can talk about this,” he said.
Those were the last words I heard from him. I tried to call him, but he changed his mobile number and when I tried to call his house he was always out.
He was my first love and it’s the same street where he normally walks me home. I lost him and I never got the closure that I deserved.